UNCLE JAY'S RULE: GAVE ME THE GIGGLES TODAY

I was attending a webcast on Homeland Security and automation in support thereof. The speaker is someone I know pretty well but I had never heard him propound his new "RULE" of technology:

If it works, it's obsolete!

TODAY NEW YORK, TOMORROW ILLINOIS? ILLEGAL ALIENS AND DRIVING PRIVILEGES

Let's see: If we let them get DL's, they might buy insurance and they'll be easier to keep track of.

Ya think a program like this might encourage both illegal immigration and illegals remaining here?

Why don't we give licenses to nine-year-olds? They could buy insurance and we could keep track of them. At least they would not be rec'ing a reward for bad behavior.

QUINCY RETAIL: BE MORE CAREFUL, BOYS

A very wonderful local specialty store has sent me an internet invitation to a super sale they are going to have. I will go enthusiastically. Super products. Good Prices. Great People. But......come on, guys........The plural of "Lady" is "Ladies" not "Ladys"

These are college educated guys. Blame it on the Web. Everything has to be SO FAST!

YAHOO! YEAH, RIGHT

Probably for 8 years, the first thing I see when I boot up in the morning is the wonderfully customizable MyYahoo! home page.

All of a sudden, some ugly, busy AOL-like template comes up. It is MyYahoo Beta (as in Barf-o). Several of my favorite features are gone or, "in development".

To get back to my faithful page, it takes about 8 opt-out keystrokes. Eventually, the nice page will probably cease to be available. Time to shop around for a new homepage template. You listening, Googs?

Sheesh, guys. If I'd wanted AOL, I'd have subscribed to AOL.

Not all change is good.

WOW, WHAT A COINCIDENCE: SMARTSPAM ON CUE

Right after the public discussion with Robert about spammers, I looked into my "moderate" box. There were two spams in there but they were not ordinary spams. They had imbedded links. If I had put them up, my sight would have clicked to theirs. I didn't look close enough before I whacked them what they were selling but it was probably drugs or porn.

They also seemed to write English as a second language.

QUINCYFORUMS: SOME GUYS ARE HARD TO HELP

It appears QF is having a hard time. In an effort to help him, I was gonna link him. I wanted to leave a comment on the Forum to tell him I was doing so.

To do that, I had to register. Fair enough. I already have about a thousand accounts and passwords. Another one would be no harm. The process is simple but..........It's not automated. The Administrator must turn the key BEFORE YOU CAN EVEN LEAVE HIM A SUPPORTIVE MESSAGE. That'll keep out Osama and Pee Wee Herman

Anyhow, maybe later with the link. Here's the tedious welcoming email. I will now breathlessly wait for the admissions committee to deliberate. My grades were good, my LSAT High and I was on the Student Council.

Sheesh!

"Your account is currently inactive, the administrator of the board will need to activate it before you can log in. You will receive another email when this has occured.

Please do not forget your password as it has been encrypted in our database and we cannot retrieve it for you. However, should you forget your password you can request a new one which will be activated in the same way as this account.

Thank you for registering."

DENVER: RESPECT THE GAME--YEAH, RIGHT

The slimeball agent for Alex Rodriguez leaked/announced during the last game of the World Series that A-Rod would buy out his contract with the Yankees and become a free agent.

Never mind that the move was tone deaf. A-Rod demonstrated he not only thinks he's bigger than his team. He also showed he thinks he's bigger than the whole freaking game! After what might be his best year, he demonstrates that he's just a technocrat, not a teammate.

Very disappointing.

CHICAGO BEARS GIVE ME THE GIFT OF TIME

From the time I was a small boy, my Autumn Sundays were built around the Chicago Bears' broadcast (then radio). My disposition was pretty much dependent upon how they played and how they fared. Once, when they were upset badly by the Chicago Cardinals and the incomparable Ollie Matson, I just stayed under the covers until school in the morning ("The Bears Ate My Homework").

It wasn't much different last year. If the Bears were playing, I was switched on, living and dying with every play. I loved that they cared so much and has so much pride. I was not distracted by the Grossman controversy. This team was completely invested in what they were doing.

Looking at it in the rear view mirror, it all really began to unwind in the last regular season game against Green Bay. I have always believed a team cannot decide to mail it in one day and play hard the next on a consistent basis. That day, they mailed it in.

Now, coming into their "bye" week, they just don't care. This team is neither well prepared nor energetic. Statistically, they are not eliminated from playoff contention but emotionally they are.

I care as much as they care. That means I now have the gift of Sunday afternoons to work at home, at the office or even hit some golf balls. Someone let me know next year when the real Bears and "SmashMouth" football return to Chicago. I don't know these guys.

SOMETIMES MOCKERY IS A GOOD THING: AT THE ADAMS COUNTY COURTHOUSE IN QUINCY......

.......We were overrun by bright, hard-working, earnest and very prepared young people representing numerous colleges and universities throughout the Midwest in Mock Trial Competition. I don't know what the economic impact was on the community but I can tell you it made for great spectator sport and really restored one's faith in the youth of America. These kids, whether they choose to be trial lawyers or use the advocacy experience for something else, are going places!

My only quibble is that there should be more General Public publicity for this event because I think some area citizens would really enjoy watching at least part of it.

BTW, it is a team sport, which makes it even more cool. I even saw one team break a huddle like we used to do in football.

A shout-out from the Basin to AMTA and the local committee who put this puppy together. It was something!

BAD NEWS, GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWS FOR GEORGE RYAN

Bad News: He lost his appeal to the 7th Circuit;

Good News: Three Excellent Judges sided with him;

Bad News: The stay of of his commitment/mittimus (delay in reporting to BOP) is almost certainly at its end.

Interesting Side Note: Judges all agreed that this trial took too long. They must read the Basin. Mentioned that a long time ago.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, VICTIMS AND THE ADAMS COUNTY SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT

Sheriff Fischer's troops got a well deserved award at the 100 against Family Violence ceremony today. It seems they go the extra mile in notifying victims when their abusers are about to get out of the joint. It also seems they make a special effort to serve Orders of Protection as soon as possible, even when the abuser goes underground.

These women aren't on the blogosphere for the most part but Quanada and the other protective agencies spoke out on their behalf today.

Even the fact that it happened in a cold rain couldn't kill the buzz.

Way to Go, Sheriff and his posse. Protecting those who have trouble protecting themselves. What a concept!

CUT & PASTE, AT LEAST HERE, EQUALS INTEREST SHRINKAGE

Been doing a little experiment with c&p. Joe is so good at it and presents a buffet of challenging stuff every day, I thought maybe I could just do it till I needed glasses or something.

For me, here, it is disappointingly not working out. When I find a really ripe c&p piece, either almost nobody clicks to it or, if they do, they don't comment on it. Don't know why. Maybe it's a trust issue--reader doesn't trust me to find worthwhile, interesting stuff and not waste his time. Don't care. I've seen enough. I'll mostly leave c&p to the experts and salute them for doing it.

For my readers and for whatever reason, it does not promote discussion.

Nothing ventured......

SPRINGFIELD: HIRING BY FEEL

This is not a manual for effective hiring practices (click)

For prospective employers. Dirty dancing is not a good way to determine an applicant's credentials.

For job seekers. Memo to applicant--try to remember underwear. It promotes a more professional discussion.

Ya really can't make this stuff up.

WELL, WELL, WELL, KENNY HUSHOFF GOT HISOWNSELF'S PICTURE IN USA TODAY

......For taking a freebie meeting with midwestern farmers to talk about ag issues.................................................................................................................................................................................................


IN THE MAGIC KINGDOM

COMPTROLLER AND SOME WELL-INTENTIONED PURISTS CONNECT THE DOTS FOR ILLINOIS TAXPAYERS

(This comment and posts have been modified. I think the topic still has value but I just decided it was no place for vague and unrelated accusations against me by some obs-comp. I left his comments which were vaguely on topic. In fairness, I took out my replies to Ahab where I deleted his comments.

In the ultimate irony, I also deleted a series of comments by a guy who never commented but says I deleted his comments. Yeah, it gives me a headache too.)

The folks who argue we are a historic "Pay to Play" State and those who say, that's just what makes the world go 'round, will all want to click here .

I think there are a lot of opportunities here to add two and two and get twenty two but it is an interesting concept, especially when you consider it is on the State of Illinois's bandwidth.

I guess this means Dan and Rod aren't exchanging holiday cards this year.

VALUE-FREE QUESTION: IF WE HAD UNIVERSAL HEALTH INSURANCE.......

.......Would Cook County Need a Public Hospital (Stroger)?

Given that Stroger Payroll is the biggest reason given for the proposed Euro-style tax increase in Cook County, this would be interesting information to have.

SLOUCHING TOWARD ECONOMIC DISASTER: PACE/METRA/CTA

I really like to take public transportation while in Chicago. I know the routes and appreciate how vital the service is. If our legislature doesn't act very soon, workers will simply be unable to get to work. The economy will suffer. Taxpayers will become tax drains (not to mention losing their pride and hope). Not subsidizing the CTA will hurt all of us in Illinois.

Wake up, people!

QUINCY IS THE NEW EUROPE

Baseball field out at Boots Bush Park, two soccer fields in. LCS on television too late for kids to watch. Commies have found a new way to quietly win the Cold War.

Get a Glove! Play Catch, America!

Sheesh

A MOMENT OF SILENCE......IN ILLINOIS SCHOOLS......RIGHT

The Illinois Legislature done up and passed a "Moment of Silence" bill for schools. Govvy vetoed it (not a real bad move). Legislature overrode. It's da law!

Now, on to my real question, how are they going to get a moment of silence when they can't even get the students to shut up during the national anthem at basketball games?

Real Question number two: IPod and Voicemail access with bluetooth OK during MOS? Gonna hold hearings about promulgating rules in each district?

Real question Number three: The first time a student whips out a rug and faces East during the MOS, are we looking at a bona fide "Oh, Sh!t" moment for school administrators? The kid in the next aisle has a brother who lost a leg in Iraq and he's not feeling warm and fuzzy about Muslims.

People ask, "What's the harm?" Wait, there'll be some.

STALLS, BUSES AND IN-STALL DAY MOVES: WHAT DID YOU EXPECT, LARRY? SOLIDARITY?

I guess this means Larry is not leading Mitt's dimpled-chin campaign anymore. Click here

BIG UGLIES AS A METAPHOR FOR LIFE SUCCESS

The Basin underwent three heartbreaking losses this weekend. The first was when my Saturday morning golf game was rained out (aborted after 9 very wet ones). Other than the limits of even GoreTex, I didn't learn much from that. Just an Act of God. That's life and it's probably see ya next year for the golf course.

The other two were the beloved Arkansas Razorbacks and Chicago Bears. There were heroics and spectaculars in each case. Looking at it as objectively as a Piggie/Bear fan can, it must be admitted in each case the difference was the collection of anonymous grunts in the Defensive and Offensive Lines. Piggies and Bears were both quite good but the Tigers/War Iggles and Vikings were better longer. The Vikings Big Uglies were just crisper and wanted it more. The Auburn Line, both ways, was a little deeper and, thus, had more stamina. When the piggies reached back for just that one, last vital stop, it wasn't there.

It was, in the end, kind of like life. Your skilled people can flash and dash. If your front line people, the people who allow it all to happen (secretaries, paralegals, financial clerks, scrub techs, IT propellerheads, LPN's) don't perform to a high level on every play, you won't win.

Oh, sure, there's always the proverbial five turnover game where somebody gains 100 yards in total offense to the other team's 300 and wins 17-14. A team with underperforming Big Uglies will shoplift a game once in awhile. Day in, day out, though, whoever constitutes your business or profession's Big Uglies better be both good and motivated or you won't succeed in the long run. (BTW, for you literalists, not all professions' Big Uglies are big or ugly.)

Insight often comes through suffering.

MAYBE THIS IS WHY GONZO HIRED A CRIMINAL LAW SPECIALIST

Holy Cheetos (Click here)

Brings to mind J. Edgar in his evening frock and high heels.

If this proves out, it represents, at a minimum, not the kind of country I thought I served

TWO THINGS I KNOW ABOUT PEOPLE AND MONEY

If you think you know who has money and who doesn't, you're wrong.

This doesn't trouble me, because I don't care.

THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT, THE RIGHT TO COUNSEL AND THE ATTORNEY-CLIENT PRIVILEGE

Be worried. Be very worried

WHILE THE SHOTS WERE RINGING OUT IN CLEVELAND

........I wonder if anybody was thinking about keeping Tort Fund expenditures low.

STIMULATION? YOU WANT STIMULATION?

The Basin is no great fan of Camille Paglia......But

If you want to have your thoughts and emotions stimulated (no matter where you stand)

read this

Geez. Pol Pot might've only whacked 1.5 Million folks so don't worry, be happy.

Credit to the letter-writer for inserting himself into the meat grinder, knowing his point wasn't going to get a fair shake.

Damn, George Will and Camille Paglia in the same Month. Better get my flu shot.

SENT TO ME BY SOMEONE FROM ARIZONA

Pretty High Quality Production, though

It should be pointed out that, in Chicago, Steve Goodman is known not so much for his work with Arlo Guthrie as for the underground song "Lincoln Park Pirates", a protest song about sanctioned towing and the unregulated profits it created for insiders.

Steve was a Cub fan, through and through, so the graphics might be a little blasphemous.

Anyway, here 'tis.

ADDENDUM: IF WE'RE GONNA DO A PLUG, LET'S REALLY DO A PLUG:

Click here for Clay Eals

HILLARY CLINTON HEALTH CARE PLAN SUMMARY

In response to earlier requests

In related comments in this and other blogs, HRC has been blasted by the right for: a) not having a plan; b) not having specifics; c) moving towards socialized medicine d) having no plan for cost containment; e) Having too specific and rigid a plan; f) Staying married to Bill when he's such an obvious cad; and/or g) Just being generally not warm and insincere.

I'm currently working on a list of health care things I believe to be true and where they logically lead us. I don't want to discuss them in the context of HRC's summary but I thought our interested readers on the left and right deserved to have the url.

OK, YOU'RE STANDING AROUND SOMEONE'S APARTMENT.....

Suddenly, a police agency charges in on a drug search warrant.

You're not a player. Can they handcuff you? Can they interrogate you?


Sure, Look Right here.

Some cases raise more questions than they answer. When is the temporary custody situation over? How long can you be cuffed? When do they have to cease questioning?

Stay tuned.

CHICAGO MARATHON: A DANGEROUS AND MONUMENTAL ACCOMPLISHMENT

I have a very good friend,38 years old, professional, charming, talented and decent. Lives in another state but with strong ties to Quincy.

Truth be told, the last five years of his life have been cruel. His response? He decided to dedicate himself to running the Chicago Marathon. This was an interesting decision because he had no history as a distance runner or a road racer.

He read. He trained. He told his friends and associates his plan was to run the Chicago Marathon.

Of course, by now, we know the Chicago Marathon was a death trap for even experienced runners. For those who couldn't get the half way point by noon, the course was closed. The heat was just too dangerous. One guy died. 10,000 registrants didn't show. 1500 required treatment, and 275 were hospitalized.

My friend made it. He ran about nine minute miles steady through the first 20 miles, then faded a little, but he made it.

This is an admirable guy and a good friend but I'll never look at him quite the same way again. He did something through the strength of his will and determination I could never have done at any age. I understand distance runners who have the gift. I can't imagine a mature adult picking it up in less than a year sufficient to complete the Chicago Marathon in killer temps.

Way to go, Buddy!

A HELPFUL SUGGESTION FOR ADAMS COUNTY YOUNG DEMOCRATS

Actually two suggestions:

1. Have the damn enormously successful steak fry every year, same time every year. (Second Friday in June really worked well but you pick the time and keep to it.);

2. Name it "The Butch." No other description will be required.

When you have it in the off year, keep the money and spend it anything you think will help the party: aldermanic elections; college student recruitment; electronic party newsletter.

Several times, YD's have come THIS CLOSE to being a true power in democrat politics here. Each time, it has not been sustained. My able, young friends, do this and prosper from doing it.

SPORTS INJURY WEEKEND

Illini favored (Oddsmaker on crack or Badgers just not that good?) Piggies play a cupcake with T-Mac whole, Heisman resuscitation. Missouri/Nebraska outdoor cocktail party. Bears at the Cheese for salvation or dumper game. Cubs on the precipice. Yankee pitching faces further exposure. State Fair Game in Texas. Big game for QND and a "lay-it-on-the-line" game for QHS.

That doesn't begin to cover it. Why can't every month be October?

FRAMING THE NANNY STATE DEBATE

Your friendly Basin usually is no fan of George Will. A pencil-necked geek from Arlington Heights becomes Buckley light to the "one true faith" conservatives by going to school in Canada and coming back talking like he's from nowhere. If you've ever watched him on the long shows on CSPAN, you get the idea he's been a pretty serious nocturnal drinker as well. While I read 26 of his columns every year, I wouldn't consider myself a fan.

But ol' Georgie has taken a break from worshipping at the feet of Emil Verban to write something everybody should read.

Shrubbie veto'd SCHIP. One side will say that means he hates kids. The other will say that means he's fiscally responsible. There's something in this otherwise smart-assed column for everybody and, likewise, something for everybody in the whole phony SCHIP debate. This is the reason why folks feel so disaffected from politics. Both sides gaming the hell out of this thing without even letting on they sniff the larger problems looming, no matter what we do about the "social programs" debate.

Please, read this whole column. Comment if you want to, but read and understand. While snide, this column could be a bookmark for historians about national politics in the information age.

Henry Clay and Sam Rayburn have left the building.

SOMETIMES......

......the other guy just plays better. The Cubs didn't do anything stupid. They got outpitched and the notably clobber-footed and stonehanded Tony Clark had his body occupied for for about three hours by the spirit of Wes Parker or Keith Hernandez (pre-coke). Career minor leaguer Augie Ojeda suddenly invented flubber but that really didn't hurt anything. It would be alarming if the Cubs had played badly. They didn't. So it's still...first one to three wins....wins.

There's geniuses all over the internet saying that Lou pulled Z. too soon. The Stated Goal of the '07 Cubs is a World Series. Lou was doing what he thought best moved the Cubs to that goal. I can live with that.

A radio genius is saying this morning that Lou let Z. bat, then jerked him. He's wrong. Z. struck out to end the top of the 6th. He pitched the bottom of the sixth and then was told he wasn't going out for the 7th. It is just fatuous to say "You shouldn't have let him bat in the sixth, knowing he was only going one more inning!" Huh? I love Colin Cowherd but he was selling "facts" that didn't happen.

"DIVISION" SERIES (MISNOMER) TURNS ON THE "DOS": SEGUNDO DETERMINENTE (OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT)

Five game series all around. Universal truth. The number one starters are a wash everywhere (Example: Is Sabbathia better than Wang every day?). Assume they split. The key becomes the twos. If Carmona wins two games, Indians win. If Lilly wins two games, Cubs win. It's like "Follow the Money" in Watergate.

Follow the two hole. That's where the troof lives!

Now don't bother me for the rest of day, I'm busy choking like a dog. First Pitch at 2105--you're killin' me here!

MY GRANDFATHER'S SON'S COUSIN'S NEPHEW

By Isaiah Thomas, Forward and inspiration by Uncle Clarence.

Just as Hunter Thompson gave birth to "Gonzo" journalism, The Thomas Boys have created a new genre "Dongster" journalism.

Dong, you won. Let it be. Ike, you lost. Apply the "Law of Holes" (when you're in one, stop digging.)

IN A RELATED STORY............

Lance Briggs is a new daddy

He's also a defendant.

In a related, related story (relatively speaking) and novel, tricky legal maneuver, Briggs has declared Tribbett a "Franchise Mother", which means that he only has to pay child support for one year, the average salary of the top five twenty one year old unwed mothers in the league, after which mother and child are free to negotiate a new deal with a linebacker to be named later.

MY NLDS ROSTER: IF IT WERE UP TO ME

Catchers: Soto; Kendall (2)

(Sorry Hank)

Infielders: DeRosa, Fontenot, Lee, Ramirez, Theriot, Ward, Cedeno (7)

You go with seven here because Ward, Theriot and DeRosa can all play OF. If you go with six Cedeno is the most expendable because Fontenot hits LH.

Outfielders: Floyd, Jones, Murton, Pie, Soriano (5)

(Pie over Monroe because we see how critical OF defense is in big games--Could change in NLCS)

Pitchers: Dempster, Eyre, Hart, Hill, Howry, Lilly, Marmol, Marquis, Wood, Wuertz, Zambrano

(11)

Trachsel did his job. There's no need for him to be on post-season roster. The last thing you need is a fifth starter who's not gonna start. Similar analysis for Marshall. Because you have to have Hart's electric stuff on the Roster, they both must sit. Perhaps a little bitter pill for Marshall but the objective is to win the five game series.

COACH WOSMAN

I talk, perhaps too much, about the outstanding leaders produced by the Quincy YMCA youth programs under the leadership of Dick Chapin and the tireless volunteer work of guys like Bob Bush, Jim Douglas, Bill Adam, Glen Hultz, and Ken Jones, just to name a few.

My friends will kind of roll their eyes when I wax rhapsodic about Doug Bruner , Scott and Jay Douglas or Brian Inman.

Well, this morning I heard another one of our graduates on the radio and was proud as heck of him. From the fourth grade on, it was obvious that Brian Wosman was a big picture thinker and a tireless worker. I didn't know Brian well. Coached against him mostly, referee'd some of his games when he was younger. Did have the opportunity to coach him in an all star game. He was always curious. He wanted to know why things happened. I remember when he was in the fourth or fifth grade, he watched my bigger kids play a game using Purdue's version of the zone press. When the game was over, he asked one of my players why we positioned ourselves a certain way. Even then, he was gathering information. (By the way, my player gave simultaneously the best and worst answer possible "That's how we practiced it.")

Now, there is no doubt Brian would have been a huge success at whatever he undetook even without his Y experience. He has a thoughtful, sensitive and supportive father, one of the best things a youngster could ever hope for. B. himself was just a good citizen. I don't remember his ever having even looking vexed with a referee. He just showed up and played the point.

Still, those young softball players in Palmyra are as lucky to have this terrific young man as he is to have their talents and dedication.

Brian, ya did a great job on the radio. For all of the guys who supported the Y programs back while you were coming up, you're another reason for us to be proud of our "grads".

Continued Success

PEORIA AND ILLINOIS CD-18: A DEMOCRAT'S SECRET WEAPON

I remember a few years ago hearing about Rocky Versace

Read, learn and maybe weep a little.

One suspects Dick will not be running alone next fall. Might be a little hard to paint this democrat into being soft on troop support.

Oh, yeah, Dick was born @ Fort Bragg.

WHO SAYS OUR EDUCATION SYSTEM IS FAILING?

Look Here

Not obscene but your might not wanna play it work if your boss is Dick Cheney.

(credit to The Inside Dope for Calling it to my attention--I'm just sharing.)