RULE ONE OF SEEKING FUTURE EXECUTIVE CLEMENCY: DO NOT CALL THE PREZ-ELECT A MO-FO

This is an actual paragraph from the Gov't's affidavit in support of its complaint. Sorry for the adult language but the adult is your Governor.


"c. ROD BLAGOJEVICH said that the consultants (Advisor B and another
consultant are believed to be on the call at that time) are telling him that he has to “suck it
up” for two years and do nothing and give this “motherfucker [the President-elect] his senator. Fuck him. For nothing? Fuck him.” ROD BLAGOJEVICH states that he will put “[Senate Candidate 4]” in the Senate “before I just give fucking [Senate Candidate 1] a fucking Senate seat and I don’t get anything.” (Senate Candidate 4 is a Deputy Governor of the State of Illinois). ROD BLAGOJEVICH stated that he needs to find a way to take the “financial stress” off of his family and that his wife is as qualified or more qualified than another specifically named individual to sit on corporate boards. According to ROD BLAGOJEVICH, “the immediate challenge [is] how do we take some of the financial pressure off of our family.” Later in the phone call, ROD BLAGOJEVICH stated that absent getting something back, ROD BLAGOJEVICH will not pick Senate Candidate 1. HARRIS
re-stated ROD BLAGOJEVICH’s thoughts that they should ask the President-elect for
something for ROD BLAGOJEVICH’s financial security as well as maintain his political
viability. HARRIS said they could work out a three-way deal with SEIU and the Presidentelect
where SEIU could help the President-elect with ROD BLAGOJEVICH’s appointment
of Senate Candidate 1 to the vacant Senate seat, ROD BLAGOJEVICH would obtain a
position as the National Director of the Change to Win campaign, and SEIU would get
something favorable from the President-elect in the future."

Can't you just see the Petition for Executive Clemency?:

"Repectfully submitted to the Mo-Fo-in-Chief

Rod R. Blagojevich, BOP #55555555, Petitioner"