A-MAYS-ING SCHOOL BOARD ELECTION HUMOR: COUTERFEIT WARNING

     I have no idea if it is connected with yesterday's post but today, I rec'd the following in an unmarked envelope via USPS, 6230, Area Code.  It is too funny not to run here but I want to emphasize two things first:  I don't think everything in the letter is true (and it is certainly not from Jeff Mays himself); Second, I actually consider Jeff a valued friend who has, in his position as a School Board Member, been very straight up with me and my office.   Still, he's a public figure and this is obviously a spoof, so I share the letter with you for amusement purposes only.

 

My name is Jeff Mays and I am running for re-election to the Quincy School Board. I have put forward several statements and commitments so far in this campaign but I wanted to communicate with you about the one issue that I feel is the most important. That issue is that people should only be retained and/or promoted based on performance and not how long they have been on the job.

Let's look at my performance on some of the key issues I supported in my 2007 campaign and since I was first elected 4 years ago.

1.              I promised that if you elected me, I would be a one term Board member and would not run again. Let's forget that one.

2.              I advocated for neighborhood schools. I found out how much more expensive it was to operate more buildings so we closed one. Let's forget that one too.

3.              I said we should never adopt prevailing wage and that I'd do everything I could to defeat it. I voted no in June 2007 but then found out we are required by law to adopt it. If it didn't pass, those who vote no can be removed from office. When it didn't pass in 2007 we had to schedule a special meeting to vote again. I told Glenn to change his vote to yes and I left town so I wouldn't be there. The next year, 2008, I voted for it.

4.              I was critical of Tom Dickerson's leadership so I orchestrated the deal between Glenn and Bud to get them as the President and Vice President after the 2009 elections. After Glenn resigned and Bud became President, I voted to elect Tom as Vice President. When it became obvious that Bud was the wrong person as President, I voted to give all the powers of the President to Tom. I guess that's one we should forget too.

5.              I promised to not raise taxes without having a referendum. I voted to raise the tax rate in December 2008 and December 2009 but did not seek a referendum. The Board has twice had a referendum since I was elected. Both times I voted against even having a referendum. I guess I didn't want to let a majority of the voters decide an issue.

6.              I was a supporter of Jim Carlock and his attorney's Tort lawsuit. I wanted the District to just settle the matter by paying the litigants the millions of dollars they were seeking Well, Jim and his group did not prevail and all they got was approximately $32,000. Although the District had to spend over $500,000 to defend itself in this multi-million dollar lawsuit, there is one bright spot in all this. My brother through his 195 S. 36^th Corp. got the two biggest checks of the settlement.

That pretty well sums up my performance. If I was held to the standard that I want for the school district employees, I probably wouldn't do too good. But I've always considered that there are two standards, one for me and one for everyone else.

So please ignore my performance and vote for me on April 5         Thank you.

Editor's Notes:  The spacing and fonts are different from the original rec'd in my office due the scanning process.  The author is obviously not a grammarian so I cleaned up a few grammos simply to prevent gnashing of teeth taking away from the entertainment value of the piece.